not appreciated

helloo to the royal greatness

we are housemans

in a learning process

and working our hardest to do the best for patient

but

if we are not good enough for the great MO

we will be more than happy to let them oncall alone

thank you...

post night shift day 1

pre night shift day 2

i should rest & sleep~~~

what?

hello people..

don't you think it's just plain annoying to be asked stupid questions

for example asking a houseman in the particular ward at around ~9pm if they are night shift duty
duh would anyone be stupid enough to be at their working place when they don't have to

common sense laaa...

or asking the next morning if they were postnight & in the end not letting go back early pon...baek x payah tanyaaaa >.<

or what time the houseman went back that postnight shift....like it would really matter

and of course other zillion stupid questions i m to annoyed to answer but had to just because they are my superiors *thank God there are such things as 3 ply face mask to cover the annoyed face*


ok even the question i m asking at the beginning of the post is stupid...

i must be badly affected..

blerghh

midas touch

i m depressed...

i guess anyone reading my entries could sense that

but last night

i was blessed with the appearance of my favourite specialist whom i had not seen so long
apparently he knew i was in the current department
yeah he saw me a few times in O.T & doing pre op
but we never chat much..........
apparently i was too busy..huhu

until last night........
it was nice
i don't know how he does it
but it made me smile while going to sleep last night
not that i was able to
got disturb for low BP impending collapse while happily grinning in bed..hihi
only had 1 hour sleep until am r/v

but thanx to favourite specialist
i was energetically resuscitating patient
my MO even ask , "ehh u x penat ke ??"
me , " mmm just holding on..hehe"

i miss favourite specialist.............
i wish i get to feel the magic every now and than
especially when i m upset~~~

LOL

bubblepop

how can free food ever be not good

especially when it's the boss who belanja

free food are always good

but of course for some weird reason

the bratty subordinate decide not to touch them

until was reminded a few times

in the end had to eat dengan hati not ikhlas......

ungrateful subordinate even unintentionally ignored boss

well not really

subordinate just doing job...nanti orang ckp MIA plk

hohoh

but not like boss gonna realize pon kan...

subordinate is just another person...a useless one plk tu

of course guilty conscience comes knocking at the end of the day

damage is done

all that can be done is damage control

ok

grow up brat..

thank you

bye

disposable

once upon a time during teaching session....

specialist on-call points to me

"come nearer...i m not going to eat you..."

yeah right

that's what you say

appearance can be deceiving....

anything which looks benign on the outside could be malignant on the inside
and vice versa.....

i m just saying

but that doesn't mean i m going to trust them
because they don't deserve it
much less need it

after all
most of us are nothing to them
just some useless additions to their team
why request for more than?
just let me go

please forgive me
this is the miserable person talking~

poker face

ok i was wrong

there is no such thing as perfection in a person

and God is fair to everyone

each and everyone of us have our fatal flaw....

i can't believe i fell for the oldest trick in the book of flaw

hypocrite......2 face

something i hate the most

ooo how well some potray the nice, smart & helpful person

when in all truth they might backstab you or worse.........

no wonder that particular boss
with all the smiley , helpful & gentleman attitude
would always some how attack me with questions..huhu
when the fact is that boss never wanted too many ho in the dept *not that i requested to be pon here..cries*
i don't know if that particular boss intention is to teach me * because he is trying to teach me*
or just make me more depress being in the department
but i don't trust him....
he already made my friend sad
and i have a feeling i will be next..damn

ooo well
i can't always have my way
been the department pet for too long
will have to learn to protect myself soon

useless

as a houseman
i know i might be lacking on the knowledge part
because i m lazy i know...

but i try to compensate it all by trying to get experience
helping others.......

yeah maybe there are times my work is a bit messy & slip shot
but never have i been said i have poor working ethics
being told that
makes me feel i m useless

i m a lil bit blur and slow compared to others
but i m trying my best to cope T.T

the current department i m in is a new thing for me

though i didn't want it in the first place as i knew i have no confidence
i try to believe it's God will for me......

but how come upto this day i m still having second thoughts
A&E sounds a lot better
though its all hard work
i feel i ll be more useful
and maybe
happier~~~

but the grass always looks greener on the other side of the fence..haishh

some people have all the luck

God is too generous to some people........

because if not

there wouldn't be some people who are not only gifted in brains
but also blessed with good looks
and goddamn HUGE hearts..........

but i guess that's why God made them a rare species

and married

or taken...

lucky them

damn..........

at least i was lucky enough to be allowed to go back home early just because he thinks it's dangerous for cute girls to travel back home alone at night..hihih

of course the o.t being shut down for maintanance is another factor..LOL

but have to study harder laaa..
he makes me feel stupid everyday..haishh

mask

alone

in Palliative care Unit

life sucks

i m a fake

so that things go my way

i hate it

being fake

but it makes life easier

and i hate it

especially unknown callers/texters

never introduce self

act as if they know me

WTH

go away la~~

sleep

is still the best

might as well quit housemanship and become a housewife

hello you
you won't be reading this but damn i can't keep this to myself

since working with you
my life is shit
somehow MO's think we are BFF
you think we are BFF
i was trying to be nice
but after a while
it gets tiring
to always clean up your sampahs
to get screwed because you just refuse to present your own cases & when it's full of sampah plans which some you didn't even carry out

as a 6th poster aren't you supposed to be the one with more experience than me
and yet
i have to do most of your procedures even something as stupid as blood taking
all cause you are in your own world trying to sort out stupid things or you are just making up stupid reasons just so i would do it for you
yeah so you have a kid who is not staying with you
and you miss your kid so much
but please don't be distracted and endanger people's lives or bring unnecessary trouble for others

and she is so damn cekap to push work to other people and make them in trouble..B****

arghhhh...i just can't stand her
wondering how she will ever be an M.O
deluded big boss wants her to be anaest M.O while her beloved husband will become surgical M.O..
woww...wouldn't be surprised if mortality hikes up..huhu

lost soul

5 postings ago.........

i was a super extra blurry, bully-able, dumb houseman
nothing really prepared me for housemanship

my fault really
i was almost always in my own world of fangirlism of Kpop/Kdrama/Jpop/Jdrama/and anything that is happy,rainbow,cakes,ice cream & candies
i was too-lazy-to-the ass medical school student passing exams miraculously by last minute studies, dumb luck & all thanks to the Almighty power above
no working experience what-so-ever before
a potato-couch by nature

nothing prepared me to run around the hospital
always on my feet
always on the run
always trying my best to absorb all the knowledge i should have as a medical student but was too lazy to do it then
always trying to get on the good side of others..
always kena marah by MO
always the one in trouble

haishh
come to think of it
it was a very tiring 1 st posting
and a terrible one too

but somehow after that
everything seem to speed up
and here i am
finishing my housemanship
with no idea what-so-ever what i want to do

the only things i had in mind are
i never want to do oncalls
nor do i want to work weekends
which leaves me with only K.K as an option..hahah
but don't like to see too many patients at clinic either..
i m lost
but it's not like we will really get what we applied right
hands up
i m lost
i duno what to do
can i just leave all to God's will..haha
p/s:- damn no more playing department pet after this..O-o

yum yum

mee goreng sotong + fresh air kelapa + air kelapa float


finger licking good...
damn i need 2nd rounds

and double damn i m getting fatter..haha

halyu star?

SPOTTED...G-D AT GURNEY???

NOT!!
he is just some wannabe dressed as GD..haha

Gurney plaza was promoting Amazing Korea from 9-13 September 2011
lucky for me, i decided to drop by Gurney today
ok so there is some korean food being promoted..mmm
but there were "kiddies" dressed stylishy k-pop everywhere
even saw GD wannabe at the escalator
still it didn't hit me there would be some talent show
i was chewing down some curly fries , drinking A&W root beer flaot & listening to Miss A 's Goodbye Baby Goodbye
when i saw a bunch of girls on tv screen dancing to a suspiciously Miss A's Goodbye Baby goodbye routine....

overall it was actually good
better than the ones shown on Hitz fm kpop talent show
way to go Penangite ^^
the best performance so far was by GD wannabe and "big bang"
it was awesome
2 thumbs up to them
no video performance by me
i was unfortunately blocked by other excited k-pop fans
and was looking in between their armpit & heads for ~~15min before i had a decent view..haha

but damn i feel old...bluerghh
missing those days with my fangirls >.<

p/s was wondering if any of my girlies still have our photos at dbsk concert??

post grand ward rounds & mortality review

FudGEeeeeeee!!!!!!!!!!!!

i was saying the F word more than 100x today.........

honestly

i m fed up being on the chopping board......................
the sacrificial lamb
the scapegoat

how come i m always the only one kena?????

plz lemme be invisible here

God plz have mercy on me

pre grand ward rounds

studyinggggggggg...............

yes i m studyingggggggggg............

trying to study

i need coffee.......

on second thoughts if i drink i won't be able to sleep later

kings cream puff doesn't taste as nice as patisfrance

i m getting fat

damn

stress

fugde

i m post call

so i m sleepy

so i m a little grumpy

and suddenly had to go HBM clinic
although my GCS already dropping

oooo and yeay
although i went to HBM a lot of time
most of the time i tumpang ppl
so this time i was lost...LOL
way to go bimbo

and the annoying balding MO i dislike
he just had to add work for me
asking me to prepare mortality review in 1 day
just my "luck" that i was in HBM when balding MO decided to ask me to prepare that
i swear he is just making my life difficult because i talked back at him the other day
and dunno how la want to trace old notes & CT scan stuff
had to bother a friend to help me..huhu

and i already have homework given by BIG BOSS i have to present

damn what is wrong with everyone
do i look that free to them...

there are 17 other houseman in the department
please take your pick
i m sick of presenting 3 x all in the duration of 2 weeks

WTF some ppl who are nearly finishing pun never presented....
yeahhh WTF!!!!!

better start the freaking mortality review before i pop a vein

i m gonna die thanx to the stupid mortality review..yeay~~~ (yeah rite)

post mortem

post call

i hate it when you just did every freaking thing possible

in the end they just ended up dying

but we are just human...i know

i m just gonna sleep the whole day...bye bye world

yeay tomorrow cuti and no grand ward rounds ^^

yeahhh

who invented heritage day

i salute them

i love being in Penang ^^

finally transformers

finally after so many times postponing to watch transformers
i got to watch it todayy...wohohoho~~~

got good seats plk tuu...despite buying it super late
thanx to the cool ticket seller machaaa...
and of course my retarded friends repo skills...

*retarded friend in action after successfully getting tickets*

so i m NOT sad anymore i passed the chance of getting 2 free tickets for transformers premiers from my MO.............
i was merely trying to stand up for myself that i m NOT ghei...huhuhu
although i know that MO was simply teasing me...haishh~~~~

my verdict:-
although the story line kinda sucks
i still think the robots are cool ^^
don't mind me laaa cause i m simply superficial like that..haha
and ooo megan fox is not in transformers 3
not that i care
i m not ghei
like i said
i just like the kewl robot

and megatron reminds me of the pityful 64 year old uncle who was admitted in surgical ward 1 month back for maggots infestation of scalp
the only difference is that megatron could picit the maggot-like-robots infesting half of his head
while poor maggot-tron pakcik had poor GCS to even care the different stages & size of maggot playing around his head despite turpentine which those maggots are somehow ressistant to..mmmm~~~

anyway...
today is my youngest sis bday
cant i believe i ditch going home to celebrate to watch transformers...gomen gomen
but i know she knows i lap her a lot....hugs hugs muahs muahs ^^
so OTANJYOUBI OMEDETOU lil sis ^^OMG i still can't believe she is 21..huhu
my memory of her will always be the small weird skinny kid with black straight hair tied in ponytail *which i like to pull* wearing dark blue pinnafore & white sparx shoes..hahah

how time flies

damn i feel old...bluek~~~

post call with no PM off sucks

do not mess with me when i m.....

a. HUNGRY b. SLEEPY / SLEEP DEPRIVED / POST BAD CALL C. PMS

sometimes i just don't care who they are

i ll just.......... SNAP!

but i m NOT sorry i talk back to you....you balding MO whom i hate

thanks to you...this is my 1st time talking back to MO

and i don't even care if you think i have attitude problem
i bet all others who knew me won't believe you either...damn balding MO

urghhhh
whatever
no use thinking too much of the balding MO
it's just a waste of my neurons
i m gonna eat my double choc cake + brownies to get high~~~